In a home of my own, cialis I sleep alone.
Years my slumber was with love and warmth.
Today and tonight I sleep alone.
Soon will be the time of tomb.
The loneliness of an empty room.
Destiny the end of doom.
The fight in on-existent light.
A place of non-existent flight.
It is there I sleep alone.

Living in time, the question of purpose and destination bubbles to the surface of depression.  Having seen all that is offered in this reality, the thoughts of flight and night embrace the day. No answer to why it must be this way, seen all is all that i say.

Nothing to do on a day like to day, except to stay away, stay awake for heaven’s sake.

Having loved and lived in peace, higher levels of love i seek. A different life for the love of meek. A different sphere for the sake of sleep. Helpless in a time of need, thankfully music is the seed.

Yesterday, Robert brought a Christmas present:  Victor Wooten’s biography titled, Me and My Bass Guitar.  I’ve both read and listened to Vic’s book The Music Lesson.  I review it periodically. And, I’ve been working on a chart that’s been extremely challenging.

I’ve been trying to figure out why I just can’t seem to get it.  And, my analysis and criticism of my practicing, playing and performance has been quite severe and pointed.  “What’s wrong with me or my head?”

I’m sure other musicians have had the same frustration.  But, that doesn’t help at all.  I’ve got to get it because it simply feels like a milestone that and bridge that I’ve got to cross before I die.

The insight I’ve received, after beginning Me and My Bass Guitar is that Vic learned to play before he learned to read music.  And that, I believe, is the problem I’m having.  I’ve been trying to read before I’m able to play.  Well, at least that the insight I’ve gleaned today.  And, I’m going to put that concept to the test.

Teachers have misunderstood the reality of playing music.  And, to an extent, the reason is clear:  Learning is counter-intuitive.  So what is taught is simply backwards.  The application:  learn to play music before you learn to read it and you’ll always be able to read the music.

I’m going to apologize for being cynical.  I have been called one of the “world’s greatest cynics” by a good friend.  It’s not that I’m cynical, it’s just that some people tend to live up to my lowest expectations.

What does all of that have to do with “illusions?”  Simply this: Often we are enticed to idolize those who “look good,” the strong and boisterous —  and who are doing self-destructive things.  Competitive professional sports, for example, create the illusion of fame and often disregard the reality of life and living.

The illusion:

What’s real?  Can you see the point.    Note: very little publicity and interviews are now being broadcast.  Why?

At this point, I will wager that Ms. Rousey is finished, as done and gone as Mr. Woods.  I would hope that she never enter the ring again and, furthermore, that the truth of violence not be the entertainment and amusement of the masses.  I also predict that if she enters the ring again, she will never be the fighter she so arrogantly claimed as her destiny.  The last I heard, she couldn’t even bite or chew an apple.  It’s hard to see how she’ll ever overcome the psychological trauma, not to mention the physical abuse she volunteered for.

As for being cynical, I’m sure my hope is absolutely meaningless to the ears of the masses.  And, in conclusion, I think it can be truthfully said that being a musician is a much better choice. And, it’s also a best choice of entertainment (as compared to the fight game).

$0.02!

This morning I awoke, read the news of the world and thought about a conversation I had on a Sunday evening a few weeks ago with fellow travelers on this stone — this Third Stone from the Sun.  We were sitting around a fire, fired up and having that kind of precious moment.   The deep philosophical one conversation and spiritual moment where in total honesty and truth each man expressed the depth of awareness, knowledge, confusion and truth about existence.

“What I’m trying to figure out,” I said,  “… is did I volunteer or was I drafted?!!!!”

“Given  a choice (for life as a human being or absolute non-existence) for just only one turn,” John said “How could you turn it down.”  The flames behind the glassed in fireplace glowed the room warmly.

Weeks later, after the Dance of the Death of the Innocents by the Deceived and Wicked, and thinking about all that occurs in the violence perpetrated by the cowards and fools and unrighteous, who are rightly called SHIT as their complementary description, I’ve finally been able to write and express that I’ve discovered in living.  I’m thankful and grateful that before my own transition, I’m able to share my insights to truth with you.

Perhaps the arguments about creation or evolution are simply a different side of the same coin:  INEVITABILITY.

Life is nothing less than inevitable.

I must thank the physicist, Dean Rust,  for the observation.  Many years ago I had the opportunity to discuss the universe with him and, as he said, “Well, Charlie, it only had to happen once.”

Given infinite time (think Toy Story) time does not exist.  Time only exists within the construct of space. Space begin only if there is an event in time, followed by an event. Before the prime event, time itself did not and cannot exist.  More specifically, time as comprehended by the mind of sentient beings, does not and did not exist. And, by definition and reality, there is but one prime event.

Within the prime event all that exists EXISTS in that instant moment, including space for the successive event (however short the duration between the two).  Within space itself life is as an inevitability in probability. The inevitability is certain to occur, thus inevitable in time.

The organization of matter within time is also inevitable, as is the manifestation of life itself in all its forms, shapes and sizes — including the human being, with the ability to perceive mind and manipulate the environment and reality, itself.

An attribute of mind is dreaming and thinking and emotions, mediated by cellular organization of the brain and its function.

Thus, the words of Martin Luther King, Jr.: “… seen the promised land.” Thus inevitable future state.  Echoing the words of the spiritual alchemist Jesus: ‘ My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you?’

The problem is that one assumes it’s a future state.  It is not.  Time is an illusion that does not exist. The prime inevitable event exists and in it all that is IS at that instant.  As the universe is expanding in movement, every moment of consciousness exists.  Only in the mental reality of the mind, time bound, does the vision of the future appear as a future state.  In fact and truth, it already exists.  It simply has not been experienced by those mortals living in that time-space moment.

That the future state will exist as an experience by those then living mortally is a certainty.  Evolution IS the proof of that truth and fact. The emotional perception of that future state, as communicated by those so inspired — including the moral values that produce that state — is inevitable, because it already exists and will be realized inevitably.  The realization will be and is as certain as this momentary existence.

“YOU ONLY GO AROUND ONCE!”

Just remeber:  It’s NOT about YOU.’ It’s US. We are inevitably ONE, within the prime inevitably, measured through the illusion of time.

Peace!